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Healing

It is a long, painful and slow process healing. You must really be determined in going through all the internal and external mess of your "dis-ease".  The body and the spirit, not only have lost their balance, but also their spontaneous capacity to recover and the first signs of diseases appear. You can't heal the body if you don't begin with your massacred psyche first. It takes so long to go through all the pain you experienced. The psychological sufference is unspeakable. But there is no other choice. If you want to recover and redeem your life this is the inevitable first step. It may easily take years.   At the same time, in a very gentle way, you begin to take care of your body. No harsh treatment. Soft and kind cures to comfort your earthly warrior who strenuously fought for you and now feels done. It almost lost hope. This process is extremely challenging, bewildering, painful: physically and psychologically. But eventually, with God's help, you manage. An...

Getting rid of bonds

 


Step after step, getting rid of bonds, malicious bonds, which hold you captive like in a mold, a matrix, you learned to consider your skin…

It takes time.

The first step is to realise you are in a mold. When you fully realise it, you just want to liberate yourself, and yet you can’t. Every time you try to cut the ties that keep you in the mold, you simply can’t. Fear and strong guilt feelings are the major hindrance. Therefore you step back, suddenly ashamed of yourself for that kind of pride that pushes you out of the common rules, daring too much. Now you see how wild you were. Submissive and obedient you feel docile and pious again, and the blessings pour onto you. You are back, well protected inside the mold.

And yet, after some time here it is again: that deep push inside. Again you feel tremendously lucid in your thoughts and feelings. You clearly see the inner prison which binds you like in a spell. You realise that indeed: it is a spell! And again you feel that terrible urge inside to severing ties. But you can’t. There is not enough strength inside.

Once again, the rebellious wave calms down and once more you humbly go back in the ranks.

Eventually, one day, totally out of the blue, without any sign that could reveal you were getting ready, something of minor importance happens, and you simply cut off everything which was still binding you to situations and people, holding you hostage in their emotional and pseudo moral blackmail! And you are out of the mold, out of the matrix. Surprised that everything happened without any effort, but very smoothly, simply and naturally!

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