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Healing

It is a long, painful and slow process healing. You must really be determined in going through all the internal and external mess of your "dis-ease".  The body and the spirit, not only have lost their balance, but also their spontaneous capacity to recover and the first signs of diseases appear. You can't heal the body if you don't begin with your massacred psyche first. It takes so long to go through all the pain you experienced. The psychological sufference is unspeakable. But there is no other choice. If you want to recover and redeem your life this is the inevitable first step. It may easily take years.   At the same time, in a very gentle way, you begin to take care of your body. No harsh treatment. Soft and kind cures to comfort your earthly warrior who strenuously fought for you and now feels done. It almost lost hope. This process is extremely challenging, bewildering, painful: physically and psychologically. But eventually, with God's help, you manage. An...

Trapped in a narcissistic relationship ?



The Hidden Truth of Survival in a Narcissistic situation


I have to write it. I simply am undignified for the many, too many logical but unrealistic suggestions given to people stucked into a narcissist situation

Let's be clear: for the empathic individual caught in a narcissistic relationship or family system, there is no defense, no strategy, and no solution that can be successfully implemented internally or relationally.

​If you are trapped in a family dynamic dominated by a narcissist (a parent, sibling, or partner) and cannot leave, you must discard almost all conventional advice.

Honestly, all the "wise" suggestions they so smartly give, only show that these psychologists never experienced such situations. ​Infact, the common suggestions—"set boundaries," "communicate clearly," "seek support"—are not only useless but actively dangerous. 

The narcissist's survival depends on total control. Any attempt to switch the relationship into something more genuine is immediately detected as a threat and punished with violence (escalated rage, guilt, or manipulation).

​The only functional truth and solution is to «Endure Until Independence».

Therefore, your sole strategic focus must be on survival through deception until you can physically and financially escape. 

The path is purely one of endurance and escape, because even the most subtle "covert survival mechanisms" may result impossible or too risky to implement under the narcissist's ever-present vigilance.

​All the appearingly wise psychological framing or suggestion are totally nonsense. The stark, unvarnished truth of the situation is that you must learn to successfully masking your reality and performing the role the narcissist has assigned to you. It's deception for survival.

The Narcissist's expectation (a) and the Victim's covert action, the Mask (b).

A) Narcissist's Requirement: The Pity Supply, They need to feel like the tragic victim. 

B) Empath's answer: Perform Deep Empathy. Express concern, listen (without reacting), and offer vague validation like, "That must be so hard." Do not offer solutions—it would imply they are capable. 

A) Narcissist's Requirement: The Validation Supply, They need to feel superior/right.

B) Empath's answer: Perform Complete Agreement. Validate their version of reality even if it's a lie. Say, "You are absolutely right," or "I see your point clearly." 

A) Narcissist's Requirement: The Scapegoat Role, They need someone to blame.

B) Empath's answer: When blamed, immediately accept it with a submissive tone: "I am so sorry, I should have thought of that." Do not defend yourself. Ends the Conflict Swiftly. Accepting blame is the path of least resistance. It gives them the victory they need, ending the attack faster than resistance ever could.

This is the path of a strategical survival. Mainly mask and pretend. The only possible defense is the Mask, to maintain every day to ensure safe passage until the ultimate objective is reached. 

The only goal: achieve physical separation. Therefore: endure until independence.


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